Death and darkness is all that I see, no light as far as the horizon, the land is desolate. The grim reaper has come and gone leaving nothing to live. It’s like one big bad disturbing night mare... I woke this morning again dreaming I was with my family on a farm we were all so happy. I haven't written in you for sometime now and I think this will be the last time I write in you, so here goes.... Life has been hard, very hard. I have walked somewhere from 100-200 miles since I have started and it’s been rough. I’ve really been scared, shaken and disturbed where ever I have gone, I've become rather paranoid and lonely.I keep thinking someone is around watching my every step but all I have seen is nothing, its all dead for miles and miles, no people no birds no nothing, run down buildings, shops, cars, bones and bad smells.

The sun came out again yesterday, it comes and goes whenever, it hasn't rained once this whole time, All the rivers and some dams are dried up and I don't know where I’m going to get fresh water from when I run out, but I’ll worry about that later. For now it's about finding life and my family. Ah my family, how I miss them, they keep me going and I have tried hard to not give-up hope but it’s hard, real hard.

I have seen a lot of scary things lately, rotting bones, people’s bones still in their cars. It was like life just stopped in its tracks it’s so horrible to see these images. My hopes have risen since yesterday when I found something unusual. I found a dead bird, it still had its feathers and flesh so there must be life somewhere out there, so I must try to keep on moving. My supplies are rather good but I don’t know how long they are going to last me so I must go in to stores to see if there are supplies that are tinned and have a low radiation count on the giger counter.

I’m feeling a bit sorry for MR. Lumpas now but what can I do about it im all the way out here alone. I’m starting to think now it might have been easier to shoot and kill Mr. Lumpas then leave the valley, I know it is a bit harsh but he would have killed me if he had the chance. It would be nice to sleep in my own bed again. I have been finding buildings that are not too run down to sleep in. I go in and see if there are any beds and if there are I stop there for the night. At average I walk for about 12 hours a day 15-25 miles and the cart has become light because I have gotten use too the weight, which is a good thing.

I’m starting to lose my mind, I’m too alone and lost right now. I have so many things to think about if I’m going to live or die, find people or be alone for ever. It’s just so hard to do any thing right now. I took a day off about 2 days ago from walking to give my body a brake and took off the safe suit to clean it, the radiation level was really low so I thought it was safe, but I was wrong, as I am sick now, to sick to carry on. This morning I woke up vomiting and feeling like dying, I’m stiff everywhere and really tired. I don’t know how long I’m going to last. I long for someone to talk to, care for, even hate. I’m too tired to carry on writing good bye one and only love…..